What is it about life that is so ironic? You want to know? I’ll tell you. We are raised and our parents were raised, and most people raise their children to have values and believe in a sense of right and wrong. We are taught and then teach that only good people have a truly good life (and possibly afterlife if you believe in that), and that even if bad people get ahead there will be consequences for being bad. Everyone seems to agree that being honest and having integrity is important. The Golden Rules.
Yet here’s the twist – once you reach a certain age you realize the world isn’t really that way. It isn’t that way at all. In fact, it’s merely an ideal that we all strive to but admittedly don’t live up to – and we all agree to that covenant. By “we” I mean our society as a whole, not that we all do bad things to get ahead. But good winning out in the end is only one scenario of how things can go. The truth, the ugly, brutal, ironic truth is that much if not most of the time, there is no consequence for breaking all the Golden Rules. Dishonesty, Greed, Cruelty, Gluttony is rewarded and doesn’t impede people’s progress one bit. In fact, the greedy, dishonest, cruel, manipulative (insert negative adjective, here) get ahead and thrive in this world.
Sometimes I feel pissed off about being lied to (waahh, I know) and about this desperate clinging that the last few generations of adults have had to keeping children in the dark about the realities of life as if it will somehow prevent such realities from happening to them. Now I’m not talking about the super, ugly, triple X or violent stuff – but the nature of people and how the world can make you stronger or swallow you whole.
Of course, that’s the point of living life, to learn these lessons, and our parents don’t have all the answers – yes, I know that and can forgive that. Rather, what pisses me off and scares me and brings forth feelings of sadness and helplessness is the collective, communal, planetary acceptance of behaving badly as a part of life while completely teaching, promoting and selling the opposite. Behaving badly means doing things we were taught as children are inherently NOT the way to be or act or treat others, but do it as adults – so that’s just about everything! Lying, gossiping, manipulation, deception, back-stabbing/bus throwing-under-ing, turncoat-ism, disrespect, sexism, racism, back room deals, under the table dealings, etc., etc., etc.
I am drawn to good, always have been. Even if utilizing the dark side can get you ahead, there is an emptiness to it that seems is a mandatory consequence. I am not built to be a corporate animal. Too phony and cut-throat, negative and anxious – that world – and it’s always like that regardless of your position. Anyone who expresses true thoughts, opinions and ideas and expects direct communication is truly dead meat in corporate America – some of the darkest energy generators on Earth.
What happens in the dark will come into the light, so the saying goes, and such darkness really does have bitter consequences, even if unseen by the rest of us.
I guess I probably just sound naive or Pollyanna myself, but I suppose I really am at that “stage” I keep talking about in previous posts. The mid-30s, when all the distractions don’t work anymore and you see the world for what it really is – and thankfully for me, what I’ll have to do to thrive in it. I think it’s a precious time for me and I am savoring every drop by writing down my thoughts and capturing moments. Someday when I’m much older I plan to read about this time in my life again.
So this blog showcases a repurposed woman freshly on the other side of a few years of chaos and struggle, and examines how that chaotic reality is the norm, it seems, for women currently in their mid-to-late-30s. We came up in a time when you were supposed to have a career and a family. We were/are tolerant and wanted change and were/are confident in what our lives were/are to be. We have put in our time and work and we were just learning about the Internet in college (early 2000s), but then, in the span of just a few years – the world changed – and we had JUST been college educated and starting our careers – perhaps a few years in – when WHAM – we were (or may have been) already in an outdated industry (those of us going into print media but it’s happened in other industries). However it happened, our lives had not come together the way we planned, with it all worked out and in the bag – career, husband who is love of life, kid/s, book deal in the works all by 35. Tee hee.
Going back to that time (and even now), it seemed the world had become more interested in the virtual than the tactile. Of course, as we sway to one end of the spectrum, so we begin to sway back to the other side. For all the virtual living we do, we are increasingly using technology to connect more with others, in person.
This is the changing and evolving world we live in and adjusting quickly to those changes is simply a reality. It is the new “way it is” (I just cannot let myself call it the “new normal” because the instant media world we live in killed that one fast).
Being born when I was (late 1970s), I got to see the world before this stage of mobile technology and now I see it with this technology. We live in a world of screens filled with instant gratification. It’s certainly a spectacle, but I feel that I am the luckiest generation of all! Our generation knows how to function without all these mobile devices (well, I will if I have to but don’t want to) because we grew up learning how to do everything manually, but in young adulthood, had to learn the world with computers (college, work) – so we received the best of both worlds.
As I say hello to the next birthday (just a couple days now), I embrace my life, my age, my place in the world and my next steps. I feel more solidified than ever before – as if it’s finally happened for real – adulthood. I’m ripened and matured, ready to handle this world we have before us.
P.S. Follow Woman Sees World on Twitter: @womansees